Tag Archives: confidence

Reality Check: When We Make A Change

The scenario outlined in my recent column on people-pleasing prompted comments from readers who agree—in that situation, it would be helpful if the people-pleaser made some changes. When we’re in a relationship where one person attempts to control the other, … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Paths We Select Through Our Choices

One of the benefits of writing is that people sometimes tell me their stories. I appreciate getting them, especially stories about choices. Recently, a young woman I’ll call Rebecca emailed me. We are acquainted, so the contact wasn’t completely unexpected. … Continue reading

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Reality Check: So What If I’m Rejected?

Self-evaluation in choice theory encourages us to honestly ask, “Is what I’m doing working well for me?” If things are going well, we would likely choose to continue. If they’re not, we might make a change. Does that seem like … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Finding the Courage to Compliment

Do you feel weird when giving someone a compliment? If so, you’re not alone. I know this because Dan Pink, best-selling motivational author, created a short video on “How to compliment people without feeling like a weasel.” This sounds a … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Encouragement of Youth

The recent passing of Prince Philip reminded me about the Duke of Edinburgh award, and that it’s important to encourage youth in positive directions. Encouragement—or a lack of encouragement—can make a significant difference for us, whether we are youthful or … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Why Not Ask?

“I’m not going to bother asking because I know what I’ll hear.” Have you ever held back from making a request using that reasoning? For example, “I won’t bother to ask for a refund because I know it will be … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Resources and Resourcefulness

Picture yourself stranded on a desert island (or an island off Nova Scotia.) As you are “stranded,” it’s implied that you didn’t intend to be in this situation and it’s definitely not what you want. Now what do you do? … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Reassessing Wants

Dr. Robert Wubbolding suggests a deceptively simple four-part structure derived from the practice of Reality Therapy. He calls it WDEP: Want, Do, (self)Evaluate, and Plan. The practice starts with, “What do you want?” Wants can be surprisingly confusing and the … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Holding on to Your Keys

Of the clever book titles I’ve found, “People Can’t Drive You Crazy If You Don’t Give Them The Keys” by Dr. Mike Bechtle is among the catchiest. Bechtle clearly identifies that there are some things we can change and other … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Things People Say

Everybody’s heard about Treena’s embarrassing situation. At least, that’s her perception. Her boss, neighbours, relatives, friends, and acquaintances know that she did something bad and was caught. It was even in the paper, ensuring that every single person knows it. … Continue reading

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