Category Archives: Helping Others

Reality Check: More Encouragement

Last post, I suggested that honesty is an important characteristic of effective encouragement. When offering encouragement, ask yourself, “Do I believe the encouraging words I am about to say, or are they just “feel-good” words and wishful thinking?” If your … Continue reading

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Reality Check: An Encouraging Word

The act of offering sincere encouragement can be as satisfying for you as it is helpful for the person being encouraged. Encouragement feels good. Encouragement can be motivational. Encouragement can be the key to a win-win in many areas of … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Fluffy, Revisited

A few posts ago, I presented this classic quandary: Is it appropriate to deceive someone if you believe the deception is kinder than the truth? Here’s the scenario: Maria’s beloved cat, Fluffy, went missing. Maria responded to the reality of … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Truth or Kindness?

Here’s a quandary for you. Martin and Maria are happily married and devoted to each other. Maria has a cat, Fluffy. Fluffy was Maria’s mother’s companion, and since Maria’s mom passed away, Fluffy has become even more precious to Maria. … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Offer of Information

A choice theory premise is that we can’t control other people; however, we can offer information. Someone who accepts information might learn a new fact, be persuaded to make a decision, or be influenced to act differently. Fundamentally, though, what … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Lessons from First Aid

Whenever I have the good fortune to participate in training, I try to figure out whether the skills I’m learning can be more broadly applied. In first aid, for example, there’s the principle of protecting your own safety. Don’t put … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Experiments in Encouragement

How do we learn? One effective method involves coming up with an idea and then trying an experiment to see whether the idea works as we think it will. Observe what happens, and then draw a conclusion based on what … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Young People Today…

How would you finish the phrase, “Young people today…”? A frequent theme is, “Young people today don’t want to work,” or “Young people today can’t handle money,” or “Young people today expect to be taken care of.” That criticism often … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Mirror, Mirror continued

Last time, I introduced you to Sam, who has been having conflicts with just about everyone, most recently including the law. As you care about Sam, you want to help. Sam has already told you that he doesn’t want to … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Mirror, Mirror

 If you’ve ever watched someone you care about act in ways that are non-effective, or even self-destructive, then you know how difficult it is to stand by. You may feel that you need to say or do something. Samuel’s family … Continue reading

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