Category Archives: Control and Choice

Reality Check: One Suggestion

Do you look forward to each day with optimism? Or do you anticipate it with dread? Maybe you’re thinking, “There’s no point in either worrying or anticipating; it will be what it will be.” Here’s a bigger question: Does your … Continue reading

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Reality Check: What We Want and What We Control

One of the structured processes used in Reality Therapy is known as WDEP, where the W stands for Wants. That is, the first step in the process is—Figure out what you want! You’d think that would be simple, wouldn’t you? … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Paths We Select Through Our Choices

One of the benefits of writing is that people sometimes tell me their stories. I appreciate getting them, especially stories about choices. Recently, a young woman I’ll call Rebecca emailed me. We are acquainted, so the contact wasn’t completely unexpected. … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Reality of Tradeoffs

Choices often require tradeoffs—we give up one thing to have another. We do this so frequently that we’re often not aware of it. For example, if you’ve driven around today, then you made a tradeoff. You traded off the safety … Continue reading

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Reality Check: When Someone Wants to Pick a Fight

Do you know someone who wants to pick a fight? Perhaps there’s somebody in your family or at work who wants to argue. Some people enjoy a fight. But the fact that someone wants to fight with you doesn’t mean … Continue reading

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Reality Check: When the Choice Isn’t Clear

How do you make decisions? We’re influenced by experience, preferences, perhaps trustworthy advice. And there are emotions, too. When we’re feeling fearful, angry or resentful, we likely won’t make the same decisions as when we are brimming with confidence, love, … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The State of Stuck

When you’re thinking about places you’d like to visit, I suspect that the State of Stuck isn’t on your list. For one thing, it’s not even a place; it’s a state of mind. What I’m calling the State of Stuck … Continue reading

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Reality Check: When Times Are Tough

At some point, I suspect that everyone faces a tough time. Your tough time could look quite different from my tough time. However, all of our tough times may have more in common than we’d think. When something interferes with … Continue reading

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Reality Check: A New Year; A New System

It’s understandable that New Year’s resolutions get a bad rap. The inevitable February stories of people who’ve abandoned their resolutions sends a message of, “Why bother?” Regardless of the time of year, however, it’s worthwhile to think about what you … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Can We Choose Our Response?

Travelling can be difficult at the best of times. As these times aren’t exactly the best of times, opportunities for difficulties are even higher now. Here’s a travel story; it’s about choices. For months, a friend we’ll call Emma has … Continue reading

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