Tag Archives: examining options

Reality Check: Ease off External Control

The Reality Therapy approach emphasizes that when we use external control, unhappy relationships are the likely result. What is external control, exactly? In “Take Charge of Your Life,” Dr. Glasser says, “In a relationship, it is a belief that what … Continue reading

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Reality Check: A Picture of Perfection

Selma had looked forward to retirement with great anticipation. Healthy and frugal, with both a good pension and physical well-being, she pictured a perfect retirement. Travel, home renovations, dinners and outings with friends—all are experiences she’s been postponing. Now, it’s … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Who’s the most effective saboteur?

Amanda and Annie are cousins. They have similar backgrounds, and they have faced similar challenges throughout their lives. There’s a significant difference between Amanda and Annie’s lives, though. Whenever a setback arises, Amanda is easily thrown off course while Annie … Continue reading

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Reality Check: What is closure, and how does one get it?

Whether you have wronged someone or someone has wronged you, healing sometimes involves closure. Closure implies putting the event behind you; “closing the door,” so to speak. How does one get closure? Rachel was Emily’s best friend, but no longer. … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Virtue of Asking

Selflessness has genuine virtue. It’s wonderful to give of yourself for the benefit of others, with no expectation in return. Now consider this: Is there virtue in asking for what you want? Or does the very idea seem selfish to … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Resilient Children; Resilient Adults

When things are going well in our lives, it’s easy to feel satisfied, to view ourselves as being effective, and to build good relationships with people. However, at some point, every one of us will experience a setback, a disappointment, … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Who’s holding the pen?

How much of our troubles (or our happiness) do you believe we are responsible for causing ourselves? All? None? Some? My Reality Therapy colleague, Becky Wentzell, uses the metaphor of looking at your life as a story to help folks … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Taking Active Control

Gregory has been waiting for years for an appointment with a medical specialist. We know that it can feel like years when we’re waiting, but Gregory says that literally years have gone by without even an initial appointment. That’s not … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Recognizing the Freedom to Choose

Once upon a time, Emma and William had a great relationship. Then, Emma decided she wanted to marry William, but William was reluctant to comply. Does the need for  freedom have an impact here? Emma doesn’t think she’s seeking freedom; … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Choice and Personal Freedom

The theory underlying Reality Therapy is outlined in the book, “Choice Theory,” with the subtitle, “A new psychology of personal freedom.”  What does choice theory have to do with personal freedom? Dr. Glasser refers to the need for freedom as … Continue reading

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