Category Archives: Relationships

Reality Check: If Romeo and Juliet knew Choice Theory…

Great romances can make for great drama, and the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet pretty much takes the cake for drama, complexity, and unfortunate outcome. Drama occurs in present-day romances too,

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The Solving Circle

Very simple ideas are sometimes the most effective when trying to improve a relationship. One such idea from choice theory that can help with relationship problems is the “solving circle.” The solving circle is an abstract idea, so to make … Continue reading

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Love, Belonging, and Compatibility

The idea of love & belonging goes naturally with any discussion of compatibility, doesn’t it? After all, isn’t that why couples become couples: to satisfy their need for love & belonging? However, in choice theory, the strength of the love … Continue reading

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Compatibility and Power

Continuing our discussion of compatibility and needs, let’s look at power.  The word “power” can have negative connotations, but everyone has some need for it. In choice theory, power refers to the perfectly natural need for appreciation and recognition: knowing … Continue reading

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Survival, Security, and Compatibility

Compatibility is associated with our levels of basic needs, so when you choose a partner with the hope of living happily ever after, it’s helpful to have some idea of need levels. Let’s consider compatibility and its connection to survival/security. … Continue reading

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What Makes Couples Compatible?

Is there someone for everyone? While Choice Theory doesn’t answer that question, it does propose an answer for why some couples are more compatible than others. So whether you are in a relationship, considering a relationship, or questioning why a … Continue reading

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Is it Nagging? Or Informing?

“Honey, would you take out the trash?”  “Honey, please take out the trash.”  “Honey, Why do I have to keep telling you? The trash! The trash!” 

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The Unspoken Bargain

Have you ever entered into a bargain without realizing it? Alice did, and now she’s getting a daily dose of frustration from an arrangement she thought would be to her benefit. Here’s her story. 

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The Friendship Agenda

Is there an agenda for friendship? The term “agenda” is so often used negatively (as in “hidden agenda”) that the idea of a friendship agenda might seem cold or even devious. An agenda, though, is just a plan; whether it’s … Continue reading

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Matchmaking Disconnections

Caring, connecting behaviours contribute to the level of satisfaction in a relationship. So, choosing a mate who trusts you, supports you, encourages you, and respects you is likely to result in a more satisfying relationship than choosing one who doesn’t. … Continue reading

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