Tag Archives: improving relationships

Reality Check: For Real?

Posted on November 18, 2012 by RealityCheck

There’s a thought-provoking TV commercial where a beautiful young woman expresses, “I believe the earth is our future; our children’s future.” The love-struck young fella across the table agrees, “We are so the same! For real!” What a coincidence! What … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Manipulation and Consequences

Posted on October 21, 2012 by RealityCheck

You’ve heard of manipulators, haven’t you? Perhaps you’ve even been the “victim” of a manipulator (or perceive yourself that way.) It can seem as if manipulative people manage to get what they want, and it’s always at someone else’s expense. … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Speak up or stand down, continued

Posted on August 19, 2012 by RealityCheck

We’ve already looked at a couple who had neglected to share important aspects of their lives with each other until it was almost too late. It is important to recognize when it’s time to speak up about what you are … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Speak up or stand down?

Posted on August 13, 2012 by RealityCheck

We each have our special qualities, yet groups of us share characteristics, such as whether one is an introvert or extravert. In her book, “Gifts Differing,” Isabel Briggs Myers states that there are more extraverts than introverts, with extraverts being … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Purpose and Information

Posted on July 7, 2012 by RealityCheck

Nick has literally been handed his purpose in life and it certainly didn’t appear on a silver platter. No, his purpose rolled up in a stroller, in the form of his son Kyle. As suggested last column, Nick has mixed … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Choice and Personal Freedom

Posted on February 24, 2012 by RealityCheck

The theory underlying Reality Therapy is outlined in the book, “Choice Theory,” with the subtitle, “A new psychology of personal freedom.”  What does choice theory have to do with personal freedom? Dr. Glasser refers to the need for freedom as … Continue reading →

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Reality Check: “Constructive” Criticism; Is it a Con?

Posted on February 9, 2012 by RealityCheck

People often try to be helpful, though it might not seem that way when you’re on the receiving end of their helpfulness. For example, think about how you would feel if you were told, “You seem awfully cranky. You should … Continue reading →

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The Solving Circle

Posted on December 23, 2011 by RealityCheck

Very simple ideas are sometimes the most effective when trying to improve a relationship. One such idea from choice theory that can help with relationship problems is the “solving circle.” The solving circle is an abstract idea, so to make … Continue reading →

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Love, Belonging, and Compatibility

Posted on December 17, 2011 by RealityCheck

The idea of love & belonging goes naturally with any discussion of compatibility, doesn’t it? After all, isn’t that why couples become couples: to satisfy their need for love & belonging? However, in choice theory, the strength of the love … Continue reading →

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Compatibility and Power

Posted on December 12, 2011 by RealityCheck

Continuing our discussion of compatibility and needs, let’s look at power.  The word “power” can have negative connotations, but everyone has some need for it. In choice theory, power refers to the perfectly natural need for appreciation and recognition: knowing … Continue reading →

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