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articles and observations inspired by the work of Dr. William GlasserCategories
Tag Archives: internal & external control
Behavioural Choices and Learning
Last column, I introduced the learning challenges of Suzi and Simon. Suzi used to perceive learning as fun until that day when she missed the introduction to algebraic equations. Now, she fears that she’s lost that and every future math … Continue reading
Posted in Learning
Tagged internal & external control, making choices
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Everybody’s still picking on Johnny
Firmly fixed in Johnny’s mind is the idea that life is unfair. More specifically, life is unfair to him. Whether it’s at work, with his parents, his teachers, even with his friends, Johnny often feels as if he is under … Continue reading
Posted in Workplace
Tagged examining wants, fairness, improving relationships, internal & external control, perception
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Everybody picks on Johnny, part 2
Johnny feels picked on. He is sure that he is treated unfairly compared to others. Even worse, he is convinced that it’s the story of his entire life. When I introduced Johnny in an earlier column, I suggested that he … Continue reading
Posted in Workplace
Tagged fairness, internal & external control, perception
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Wherever you go, there you are
We all need others to some degree. In reality therapy, that’s referred to as the need for love and belonging. Our lives are more satisfying when we can spend time with people we care about. However, there are benefits to … Continue reading
Posted in How it is sometimes
Tagged blame, internal & external control, making choices
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The Unspoken Bargain
Have you ever entered into a bargain without realizing it? Alice did, and now she’s getting a daily dose of frustration from an arrangement she thought would be to her benefit. Here’s her story.
Posted in Relationships
Tagged examining wants, internal & external control, making choices
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The Helping Agenda
To finish up this series on agendas in relationships, let’s take a look at a “helping” relationship. This could be a counselling relationship, but I’ll look at a simpler relationship, such as with a coach or a mentor. When one … Continue reading
Posted in Helping Others
Tagged internal & external control, win-win
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The Friendship Agenda
Is there an agenda for friendship? The term “agenda” is so often used negatively (as in “hidden agenda”) that the idea of a friendship agenda might seem cold or even devious. An agenda, though, is just a plan; whether it’s … Continue reading
Posted in Relationships
Tagged improving relationships, internal & external control
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Are you guilt-ing?
A benefit of applying choice theory/reality therapy in your life is that you can gain personal freedom—the freedom that comes with understanding what you can and cannot control. In previous columns, we’ve looked at situations where people attempt to coerce … Continue reading
Posted in Guilt, Unfairness & more
Tagged freedom, internal & external control, making choices, win-win
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Guilty? Or Not Guilty?
Internal motivation is a foundation of choice theory/reality therapy. The idea is that our actions—the behaviours we choose—aren’t forced on us, but are the result of choices made in our own brains. Because reality therapy views behaviour as not only … Continue reading
Posted in Guilt, Unfairness & more
Tagged improving relationships, internal & external control, making choices, win-win
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