Having Reality Therapy as my area of interest, it’s natural that people tell me their troubles. And there are plenty of troubles to hear, ranging from the heart-wrenching to the mind-boggling.
If I’m asked for advice, I usually respond by Continue reading
Caring, connecting behaviours contribute to the level of satisfaction in a relationship. So, choosing a mate who trusts you, supports you, encourages you, and respects you is likely to result in a more satisfying relationship than choosing one who doesn’t.
The behaviours that you choose to use are just as important as those of your potential mate. Can you comfortably trust, support, encourage, and respect this person? Continue reading
The Internet as matchmaker! Widespread computer use has caused plenty of changes to society over recent decades, but who could have seen that one coming? Young (and not-so-young) folks use various web applications to help them choose mates. Do you know anyone who’s met a “significant other” through the Internet? It’s surprisingly common (surprising to me, anyway).
How does this phenomena relate to Reality Therapy? Let’s think about the criteria we use when we make our choices. Continue reading
For this last glimpse of Winnie and Winston’s workplace, let’s take a look through Winnie’s eyes.
From Winnie’s perspective, she’s forced to lead an under-performing team of blamers and complainers. Winnie’s pride, and perhaps her job, is at stake. Continue reading
When you’re a worker bee, stuck in an unsatisfying work situation, it’s easy to find someone to blame. Your co-workers, manager, even the “big boss:” if only “they” knew what they were doing, everything would be better.
The Reality Therapy approach doesn’t spend energy on figuring out where to place blame. Continue reading
When Winnie talks about work, as she did in the last column, you can tell that her perception is that she has a problem team. She feels like she’s trying to lead a bunch of blamers, complainers, plus one aggressive smarty-pants!
That aggressive thorn in her side is Winston. He’s young and bright, and in Winnie’s estimation, he’s out to get her. How does Winston see the situation? Continue reading
While many aspects of our lives offer the potential for conflict and misunderstanding, conflicts at work can be especially troublesome. Work has an impact on our basic needs, particularly power (the need to accomplish) and survival (the need to be paid!) Here is Winnie’s story. Continue reading
Last column, I suggested some actions to help move away from “discouraging,” as changing what we do is the most effective route to changing what we feel.
The next most effective way to change a feeling is to change what we are thinking. What thoughts go with “discouraging”? How about: “I can’t…” “I shouldn’t have…” “I’ll never be able…”? Continuously repeating thoughts of that ilk sets a discouraging tone, doesn’t it? Continue reading
Discouraging: It’s a bleak word. Usually, the word “discouraging” refers to one person attempting to influence another by raising objections, even trying to take away hope or confidence. In the phrase, “Harry is discouraging” we expect an object. Who is he discouraging? Continue reading
Do you ever get discouraged? When life isn’t going well and it seems like the whole world is conspiring against you, you can get that down-in-the-dumps feeling. Saying, “I’m discouraged,” can practically make your head droop and your shoulders sag; you might even add a heavy sigh for emphasis. Continue reading
