Reality Check: Overcoming Shyness is an Employability Skill

Posted on July 12, 2015 by RealityCheck

In recent posts, I’ve suggested that the ability to get along with co-workers, bosses, and customers is a valuable employability skill. Unfortunately for some folks, shyness makes it difficult to get along.
Have you ever perceived that the “sweet talkers” get more opportunities, better jobs, and more easily make friends than others? It’s not necessarily because they are the best qualified or the best friend-material; it could simply be that they present themselves with confidence.
It may seem unfair if you are saddled with shyness while others are blessed with self-assurance. They don’t get tongue-tied, self-conscious, or embarrassed. Everything comes easily to them! Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Employability Skill of Getting Along… But How?

Posted on July 5, 2015 by RealityCheck

Last post, I suggested that the skill of “getting along” is essential if you are to succeed in most any workplace.
If you find yourself in disputes or isolated from your co-workers, then it may help to work on your “getting along” skills. How? Here are some suggestions.
1. Recognize that getting along with people is important. It’s hard to make an effort at anything unless you believe it matters. If you want to get/stay employed, then you need to get along. When the going gets tough (as it likely will) you may need to remind yourself that it matters. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Employability Skill of Getting Along

Posted on June 30, 2015 by RealityCheck

Employability skills are the skills that help you get and keep a job. You might have thought that the technical skills that enable you to do your specific job are all you need in the way of employability skills.
For example, if you work in retail, you need to run a cash register. If you work in medical technology, you need to analyze samples. And if you are a pilot, it’s good to understand your instrumentation!
However, while job-specific skills are essential, there’s an additional set of skills that’s needed by pretty much anyone who wants to remain gainfully employed.
While sometimes referred to as “soft” skills, there is nothing soft about them.

Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Lessons from the Pond

Posted on June 28, 2015 by RealityCheck

I don’t fish. However, I was on a pond recently, fishing. Everybody knows that while there may be moments of actual fish-catching while fishing, there is inevitably plenty of think-time in between those moments.

Here are some of the life lessons that came to me during my time on the pond. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Information in Action

Posted on June 14, 2015 by RealityCheck

Recently, I came across a near-magical convergence of two of my interests (that’s quality assurance and choice theory, of course.) The weekly quote on my favourite quality assurance website was a choice theory quote from Dr. Wm. Glasser!
Glasser said, “What we get, and all we ever get, from the outside is information; how we choose to act on this information is up to us.”
That’s useful to remember, whether we are providing information or on the receiving end. How might it help?
Think about how people sometimes get into conflict. One person tells another what to do and expects action as a result. Action doesn’t happen. Conflict results. Have you ever experienced that? Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Angry Stance

Posted on June 7, 2015 by RealityCheck

Do you have an automatic mode? That is, do you wake up feeling pretty much the same every day? Is your first reaction to a situation more or less the same, despite whether the situation is positive or negative?

Some folks seem automatically happy, others sad. Some are easy-going; others angry. Does the situation cause the reaction? Or is it a choice of response?

To an outsider, Darren’s automatic mode is “the angry stance.” From the multitude of choices available, when given the slightest provocation, he chooses anger. But Darren doesn’t see it, so let’s look at some examples. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Treasure Hunt

Posted on May 31, 2015 by RealityCheck

Humans have problems. As I’m interested in helping folks overcome problems, I look for information on problem-solving. In a recent article, “The Obstacles of Everyday Problem Solving,” author James J. Rooney connected problem-solving and treasure-hunting. How might treasure-hunting help with problem-solving?

When we think of problems, we often feel bleak and discouraged. “Oh dear, yet another problem. Life is just one problem after another…” Do you know that feeling?

Now, think about hunting for treasure. Or solving a puzzle. Or figuring out the clues to a mystery. That’s a different feeling, isn’t it? It’s fun. It’s rewarding. It’s not dull and depressing like problem-solving. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Friendly Support

Posted on May 24, 2015 by RealityCheck

“You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family!” As we can, indeed, choose our friends, it makes sense that friendship would be supportive, encouraging, and helpful for both people. But that’s not always the case.

Some friend relationships involve “friends” who are not at all supportive and may even hurt one another.

Phil had a recent health scare and decided to quit smoking. He’s tried before without success, but he has new motivation now. It will be difficult, but he is determined.

Mark, Phil’s lifelong friend, is aware of Phil’s situation. Mark is also a smoker. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Smart Praise

Posted on May 17, 2015 by RealityCheck

I have previously suggested that supportive behaviours, such as encouraging and offering recognition, are helpful for building strong relationships. How about praise? Is it an effective way to recognize and encourage?
When little Joey started elementary school, he’d already had some preschool education. Thus, he easily caught on to reading, writing, and working with numbers.
Parents and teachers alike praised his intelligence. “You are so smart! You’ll never have to study.” They express in amazement, “He hears something once and knows it. He’s just that clever.” Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Choosing a Mindset

Posted on May 10, 2015 by RealityCheck

For someone with math difficulties, I often recommend the website www.khanacademy.org. I suggest the site because it offers opportunities to practice: you can work as much or as little as you want, and you can progress quickly or slowly. It addresses levels from the very beginner to the quite advanced. In addition, it’s fun and it’s free.

This isn’t an ad for a website, though.

What recently got my attention is some cooperative work between Khan and Stanford University about growing one’s intelligence. It looks at the difference between a “growth mindset” and a “fixed mindset.” Continue reading →

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