Category Archives: Choosing Behaviour

Reality Check: Indecision, Imperfection, and Kale

My plan this year was to plant a nice bed of kale. I envisioned a continuous supply of fresh kale for lovely, nutritious salads. Buying the kale seeds was easy. But I couldn’t decide where to plant them. It was … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Relaxation and Everyday Anxiety

Last time, I mentioned that Dr. Martin Seligman has a couple of suggestions to lower everyday anxiety levels. One is progressive relaxation, also known as progressive muscle relaxation. This technique is hardly new; apparently first described nearly a hundred years … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Influencers, Helpers, and Heroes

We may never know the effect of extending a small kindness. In fact, we could perform a genuinely heroic act and never learn the result. We may not even know whether anyone noticed. Being helpful and kind is more satisfying … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Going My Way?

Things don’t always go my way. It’s possible that things don’t always go your way, either. Given that’s the reality, how do we deal with it? What responses are effective when we are faced with the inevitable disappointments, perceived unfairnesses, … Continue reading

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Reality Check: We can do it!

What does encouragement look like? Think way back and picture the poster of Rosie the Riveter. That’s one picture of encouragement—Rosie’s determined face under the slogan, “We can do it!” with her sleeves rolled up and her muscles flexed. The … Continue reading

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Reality Check: The Rather Card

Even when you know that what you’re doing isn’t working well for you, it can still be hard to make a change. How about a helpful tip? Here’s one: the “Rather Card.” How does it work? As it was originally … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Attachment to Things

Did you resolve to get more organized this year? You’re not alone. You can take control of your space, and the sales flyers that feature plastic totes and pretty boxes imply that they can help. But whether it’s elegant bamboo … Continue reading

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Reality Check: A Chosen New Year

You’re only one person, but I know that you play many roles. You may be a mother or a father. You may be a partner in a relationship. Each of us is, or has been, someone’s child. You may identify … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Should, Could, Would Like to

Dinah feels exhausted every morning, even before her day gets started. Why? She has an impossibly huge list of tasks, all conveniently stored in a jumble in her head. She thinks, “I should call that customer,” “I should pick up … Continue reading

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Reality Check: Your Power Source

A young woman I’ll call Yvette signed up for math class. The first day, Yvette informed me that she can’t do a specific, very basic type of problem. Over the years, others have tried to teach her but she just … Continue reading

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