Reality Check: Maybe I Can…

Posted on February 5, 2026 by RealityCheck

When many of us lost power during the recent snowstorm, our habitual routines were disrupted. While even I am not old enough to remember cozy gatherings around oil lamps in the pre-electricity days, I understand it was not all “bad old days.” But our expectations, what we consider essential to be satisfied, have certainly changed over the years, haven’t they?
However, we do have some control over whether we are satisfied or not. According to Choice Theory, we are constantly weighing what we want against what we perceive that we have. If they match nicely, then we are satisfied, at least to some degree. If not, well, then we’re not satisfied.
What wasn’t matching our expectations? Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Dilbert and Beyond

Posted on January 27, 2026 by RealityCheck

Scott Adams has passed away. To many, Adams is known primarily as the creator of Dilbert, that cartoon character with the flipped-up tie and a sincere effort to do his job well despite the challenges of a less than-perfect workplace. As most workplaces are somewhat less than perfect, many people found common ground with Dilbert.
Human behaviour can be absurd, and that’s what Adams presented in Dilbert cartoons. Sure, it’s frustrating when you actually have to work with annoying, counter-productive bosses and coworkers, but it’s pretty funny when you see it happening to someone else, even if it’s just a cartoon strip.
Adams also created a serious body of work, including writings on how to persuade, how to change your perceptions, and ultimately, how to make yourself more useful, successful, and happier. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Positive Power of Doing Something

Posted on January 22, 2026 by RealityCheck

Any time is a good time to assess how things are going, and the dawning of the New Year can add an extra little motivational kick. Thus, I’d recently suggested that now is a great time to take stock; to do an inventory, so to speak.
Let’s say you took that suggestion and ran with it. If so, then you have a written inventory of what’s in your life that’s valuable to you. Your list might include the people you know, where you live, what you are able to do, what you have, and perhaps even what your values are, such as what you know to be true. This is your inventory.
Choice Theory suggests that our actions can drive our thinking, and ultimately our actions can even direct our feelings. How is that helpful? It means that when we are feeling dissatisfied in some way, taking some kind of action can help. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Taking Stock of Our Inventory

Posted on January 12, 2026 by RealityCheck

From time to time, many business take inventory. They look at the company valuables, such as equipment, raw materials, product that’s ready to be sold, and they record what they have. Is it what they expected? Are there important things missing? Are they over-stocked in some ways?
Many of us look at the dawning of a New Year as a time to consider a fresh perspective, make new starts (i.e. go to the gym) and assess how we want to progress. One activity that could be helpful at this point is to take stock; essentially take an inventory of the valuables in our lives.
In Choice Theory language, we could refer to this activity as self-evaluation. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Fresh New Year, Fresh New Changes

Posted on January 2, 2026 by RealityCheck

There are changes coming! While I’m at it, I may as well throw in a prediction about Maritime weather: It’s going to change! Not a big surprise, is it? Changes happen; some for the better; others just make things worse.
The dawn of a New Year gets us thinking about fresh new starts, taking different approaches, out with the old, in with something new. That’s all a way of saying, “I want a change.”
What might we want to change, exactly? Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Gifts and Presence

Posted on December 26, 2025 by RealityCheck

It’s that time of year when many of us focus on presents. Ads surround us promoting the message: this is a time to buy.
Granted, getting and giving packages wrapped in festive paper and glittery ribbons does add a certain joy to the season. And, as many have said, “It’s the thought that counts.” The knowledge that someone cares for us, expressed in this tangible way, has value.
I’m going to suggest a wonderful gift that we can give to ourselves or someone else. It’s easy to find and inexpensive. It’s a present that encourages being present. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Where Will I Put My Attention Today?

Posted on December 26, 2025 by RealityCheck

My former colleague Jim had to attend a company meeting in New Brunswick with a few other employees. They drove out in early morning, allowing plenty of time for arrival. About half-way, they switched drivers; Jim took the wheel.
Jim was relatively new to Canada, but he had lots of European driving experience. He drove quickly and confidently. They arrived at the meeting. Late. Very late. Why? Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Choosing Words for Difficult Conversations

Posted on December 13, 2025 by RealityCheck

Last time, I introduced Casey and Cathy’s story. It’s one where Casey has become resentful, perceiving that the more she does for Cathy, the greater are Cathy’s expectations. “Favours” have become demands.
Casey has decided that she needs to address the situation. Why? It’s affecting her attitude. The generous, kind-hearted spirit she once had is now cold and suspicious. One must not give an inch, or a mile will be taken! This is new for Casey, and she doesn’t like it.
Thus, the need for a conversation. It may be a difficult conversation, even a confrontation. Uncomfortable conversations can get ugly. People may say hurtful things; relationships can be destroyed. However, avoidance isn’t the answer. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: Does This Call for a Confrontation?

Posted on December 6, 2025 by RealityCheck

What does a satisfying life look like for you? For many people, an important measure of a satisfying life is that it includes being on good terms with people. Exactly who and how many people will vary from person to person.
Some folks believe that it’s important to be on good terms with everyone they meet, while others are happy with a few close friends or family members. In fact, some of us need only one close person to be satisfied.
Whether it’s a big crowd or a tiny circle, staying on good terms with the people who matter to you can be easier said than done. Conflicts may not be inevitable, but the opportunity for conflicts does arise. No matter how close we are, different people have different opinions, beliefs and priorities. We won’t see eye-to-eye all the time. Continue reading →

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Reality Check: The Habit of Communication

Posted on December 6, 2025 by RealityCheck

Habits matter. They can affect how well our bodies work. They can influence whether we spend much of our time feeling joyful or despondent. Our habits can also contribute to how warm and connected we feel to other people.
It can be tempting to think that we don’t have control over our habits; we do them automatically. Yet we know that when we put our minds to it, we can deliberately create our habits. For example, we could develop a habit of getting up at a specific time every day. The process of creating the habit might be aggravating, especially in the beginning, but it’s possible to do it. Continue reading →

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